You are an idiot.

Been very miserable for e past few days.
I had been pondering what to do about it; to totally back off or to stay on? Just because of this stupid question, I ended up not sleeping on friday & went for guard duty e following morning on a zombie mode. But it gave me alot of time to think & I came out with a conclusion.

Fuck e conclusion. Do you think I really really want it? I just dont want you to be pressurise from all sides, want you to be happy, smiling all times. It took me alot of courage to force those words out of mouth. The walk from holland v to commonwealth was a damn long one, I was crying & texting all e way. That msg was e final blow, it really excruciated me. All along I was waiting an answer from you. Hints did come, but it has never pointed at my direction, so how e hell am I suppose to do know what to do? Dont you think its too late to tell me now? When I could have really done something about it? I admit I am damn stupid not to realise it, I really dont know alright! If I assume, means I think too much & now I'm fucked cos I didnt.

And what am I supposed to do now? Perhaps it still not to late to do anything..