Why?

Sometimes u wonder, whether e ones whom have been with u along e road, are e ones who understand u? Isnt it baffling that we often use time to deem how strong a friendship/relationship is? But deep down inside, u know that it isnt really a strong indicator?

Lol. I have been thinking hard for e past few days, about e last 5 years of my life in r/s, of what I had done, what I went thru & what did I learnt.

A bad temper which I have been curbing.
That I cant take love as e main priority in life.
I learnt that there are some barriers which u can never overcome in life no matter how determined u are to break them.
Never to be complacent.
No matter what happen, life still goes on.

Problem is, each new r/s brings a whole new perspective into your life. I thought I could use whatever I learnt from e previous ones to prevent history from repeating; but e rules change everytime. All I want, is just that everyone be happy. I always try to, but there is bound to be one party that is neglected. To make things worse, I didnt realise what I neglected & I might be losing it forever. Maybe to some of my friends, they think whatever am doing is futile while some think that it still worth a try. I understand e individual viewpoints, but havent u guys thought that its my happiness? I love her & there is one thing which I never really mentioned much, she has always been my priority; I treat her as my family. Nevermind if any of u arent happy with my decision, but at least respect it? The yearly chalet with u guys have always been an occasion I always look forward to. Without fail, I would attend e 3 days, regardless of any activities, am game for it. To all your requests, have I ever say no to anything? So, now am just making a very simple request, and thats to just only spend alittle more time with her; is that asking too much? Seriously, I can just forgo e chalet & spend e time with her? And e thing is, I know that how important this gathering is to all of us & thats why there is a need for you guys to know beforehand. Cos she is important to me, & so are u guys.

Hai.. I dont know how to express myself well most of e time, though talking crap am e best in it. Lol, I sudden thought of e 1st time we had coffee at starbucks in orchard. Life it is as it is.

Hope things turn out well..